So lately, Emily has become quite the whiner at Marmie's Playhouse. I believe her whining may be about to drive my mother to drink so I thought I'd go online today and see what kind of tips I could find from other mom's and parenting sites about breaking your child of whining (without beating the ever-lovin' tar out of them) . . . What I found was very scarce. Here are some of the ideas I found and my responses to them:
When you notice her whining, call her attention to it. (Done. . . I already look at her and say "seriously? Whining AGAIN? . . . okay, perhaps that's not what they mean. I will work on this one. I'm sure the problem she's having at 19 months is just that she's not conceptualizing that she's speaking in a whiney voice. Read heavy sarcasm here)
Reinforce non-whining. (Good idea . . . but what if the only time she's NOT whining is when she's listening to songs from Enchanted? Because, I gotta tell you folks, if I hear "That's How You Know" a few more times, I'm gonna go shoot a furry woodland creature)
Notice when she whines and choose your response. Changing the pattern of whining begins when you change how you respond to it. (Again, I feel that this puts WAY too much responsibility on me as a parent. (kidding!!!) Wouldn't it be better just to hand her an illustrated pamphlet on why we don't whine? It could have pictures of mommy and daddy holding their heads with a caption that says "you don't want mommy and daddy's heads to explode DO YOU?" Too much?? lol)
"If my children whine, I make it clear that I did not understand what they have said (even if I have). They (soon) realize that they must speak in an acceptable way, i.e. moderate tone, (proper) enunciation. ... When they speak in an appropriate way, they are acknowledged and addressed. When they whine, they are misunderstood and unanswered." (Aaah, yes . . . at one, my daughter will clearly understand the bargain this mother describes. I'm not sayin it won't work but I think that if I start in with Emily on her tone and enunciation, she's just gonna start whining for me to stop. . . heck, I might even start whining about having that conversation.)
Look, I'm not saying that her whining is okay. It annoys the heck out of me and I want to keep my mother as her care giver so we're going to have to find a strategy, I just don't think any of the above (maybe a combo of several would be better) are going to single handedly win the battle.
I'll keep working on it.
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