Funny things today

Okay, today was a day for funny things to come out of my mouth. I know, I know, you're thinking to yourselves, "doesn't something funny come out of your mouth EVERY day?" Well. . . yes, actually, that's true. lol.

Anyhow, today we were off work for Veteran's Day and my mother called to see if I'd like to go do some shopping and perhaps pick out one of my Christmas gifts. Uh, YEAH! So off I went (after waiting for like 4 hours for Stanley Steemer to arrive. How my husband got "they'll be here between 8:30 and 9:30" out of "you are scheduled for sometime between 9 and noon," I will never know. . . I could have slept for like two extra hours!!). I met mom at the store and she soon got tired of waiting for me to hem and haw over what I wanted and she went off to wander. I was wearing a blue shirt that I really love but that I NOW know, my belly has outgrown. I reached up for something at the store and the shirt rode up, showing off some tummy and (I've gotten used to talking to Emily without regard for where I am) I said "Emmy, please leave mommy's shirt alone." Which would have been fine had there been no one on the same aisle or a small child around who could have possibly been Emmy. Instead, there was just an old woman who looked at me like I was very strange.

As I was making dinner tonight, my husband came in and I did the gratuitous "my belly is sooooo big" display by lifting my shirt up above my belly button (you don't have to thank me for the visual) and showing it off. What did I get in return? A very weird look from Scott. And here's what came out of my mouth: "don't you look at my stomach that way. . . this is a vessel of life creating activity!" I don't know where it came from but Scott almost spewed root beer out of his nose. Niiiice.